Crying is not a childish response to a situation. It doesn’t mean that you’re an irrational, over sensitive person.
It means you’re a human who feels things, which is never a bad thing.
Tag: important
SELF LOVE DOES NOT MEAN HATING ON OTHERS TO FEEL BETTER ABOUT YOURSELF
Please know being your kindest doesn’t mean you have to allow people to treat you like shit. No one is allowed to treat you badly or speak badly about you and you should never let them. Sticking up for yourself is not being mean, that’s knowing your worth and enforcing it.
You gotta understand that some people never really grow. They never learn their lesson. They never recognise their mistakes, they never acknowledge their faults, they never admit they were in the wrong. You will never receive an apology from them, and you will never see their behaviour change.
sorta related but i dont like that tumblr has made “unhealthy relationship” mean “one person is an abuser and the other is a victim”
unhealthy relationship means just that. a relationship that is unhealthy. whether because a party is uninterested, both parties bring out the worst in eachother, theres just no more spark, etc
just stop using “unhealthy relationship” as if its perfectly synonymous with “abusive relationship”
abusive relationships are DEFINITELY unhealthy relationships but not all unhealthy relationships are abusive, ya dig?
Important post.
Not everyone you don’t get along with is an abuser.
Friendly reminder:
If someone refuses an alcoholic drink, then:
– accept their answer
– offer them something else
– don’t ask why, it’s probably none of your business
– don’t get all weird and defensive and act like they’re judging you, they just don’t drink! They’re not doing it AT you!
– for the love of god, don’t try and buy/give/sneak them alcohol anyway!!!
I literally don’t understand why people get so triggered when people turn down alcohol. Like, why are you pressed? What does that have to do with you?
I personally hate the “congratulations” I sometimes get as a woman of childbearing who turns down alcohol. No, I’m not pregnant I just don’t want to drink at that time.
the one problem i have with people my age and younger is that a lot of us do not have hands on hobbies. like i have spoken to so many people my age who go to work, go to school and then fuck around on their phone/computer for hours and then ???????? like no wonder ur depressed and have low confidence in urself. u need to get ur hands on something, feed those dopamine receptors! learn how to play guitar, garden, scrapbook, fucking make model trains. i don’t give a shit, MAKE SOMETHING!!
it feels better than drugs when i finish making a thing—and then show it off or gift it.
and then so people my age say to me ‘well—i can’t draw/paint/knit/etc. like you can. my stuff would be terrible.’ yeah, well duh—a part of developing skill is sucking at something and then practicing it over and over and over again until you suck less. u’ll have a hard time feeling lonely or bored when you can’t stop thinking abt a technique you want to try or something you want to make for someone else. making things has SAVED MY LIFE. it gave me a reason to keep living day after day when i wanted to die.
making things have improved my generational relationships (when i worked for the newspaper i would talk to customers abt jamming recipes or cross-stitch, one of my grandmas always gives me pattern books and tell me abt when she knitted things for mom, my other grandma is giving me a wedding quilt that HER grandma gave her 50 years ago because she knows i will appreciate it). it also got me likeminded friends who also make things.
take a ceramics class! pick up water colors, bake cakes! learn to work on cars! make soap. DO SOMETHING THAT DOESN’T INVOLVE STARING AT A SCREEN.
Hobbies cost money, Helen.
Do you eat? Then you can have a hobby.
Can you see green outside? Can you get some dirt? Then you can have a hobby.
Do you have a pen and paper? Hobby.
Something with a keyboard? Hobby.
The ability to walk? Hobby.
Get creative and don’t be a pessimist is step one Barabra.
Acting like it’s easy or simple to have an ENJOYABLE hobby on zero budget is a puerile view that shifts the blame for the unhappiness of people trapped at the bottom of a dehumanizing, vicious system. Its possible of course. There are people who are into things that can be done cheaply, and that’s great! But not everyone takes joy in the things that can be done on a budget of next to nothing, and we shouldn’t EXPECT people to!
Might as well lie down and die then! God forbid anyone try to better themselves.
Have two feet and a heartbeat? Go for a fucking walk, do some pushups, volunteer to play with shelter dogs.
Have two hands and a heartbeat? Sketch. Napkins are free, steal a pen from your job, voila! Picasso.
Have one hand and a pacemaker? Might I recommend composing music on garage band?
The Y offers low-cost social classes. There are also coding classes online. Turn a hobby into a job!
Your computer has a microphone. Start making podcasts.
Crafty and bedbound? Try watercolours; they’re available at the dollar store.
Granola hippy? Get a towel, find a floor, queue up a yoga tutorial on YouTube. Namaste.
Garden witch? Dollarstore pot and a small bag of potting mix. Take your old head of lettuce, keep the bottom wet for a day, put butt of lettuce into dirt. Voila. Salad. Mint works well and is likewise indestructible.
Not into sports? Read books online. There are thousands of classic titles available. Internet got cut off? Library. Illiterate? Perfect — there’s your project. Or: books on tape, available at your local library, for free.
Look — I don’t take joy in my commute and I wish I had a helicopter to take me everywhere I wanted to go. But whining about my misfortune doesn’t solve my problem, and neither does this defeatist attitude.
If you have the time and tech to scroll this website, you have the time to develop a fulfilling hobby.
Anything else is just wallowing in your own misery because the alternative — trying and failing — is too daunting.
Oh well. Life is daunting. So either get it done or get it over with; it does not get any easier.
Lmao y’all are really over here assmad at the very idea of bettering your lives in any way. It’s kind of pathetic.
General cost of my handicrafts:
Acrylic Yarn: $2
Pair of knitting needles: $3
Knitting tutorial: Free w/internet access
Knitting a basic scarf: $5 total
Embroidery thread: about 50 cents each
Aida cloth: $5
Embroidery needles: $1
Pattern: again free with internet access
Embroidery project with 3 colors: $7.50
Macrame bracelet with embroidery thread: $1.50 with those same three colors
It’s not expensive y’all just lazy.
But Viking, I don’t have the patience. Crafting is the only thing I personally have any real patience for.
Well, I don’t have the time. Do you have the time to watch something on tv? You can multi task: watch your show and craft. I’ve been doing that so long that it feels unnatural if I’m not.
I can’t I’m depressed. It’ll help with your depression trust me.
Again, why better your mental health when you can just be lazy.
Also to do art as a hobby you don’t need shit else other than a pencil/pen and some paper. Hell, libraries pretty much give out scraps of paper for free and printer paper doesn’t cost that much, a pack of 500 sheets will cost about 5 – 8 bucks depending on where you live, and just about everyone has a pencil or a pen… If not, steal one from work, if that isn’t possible, you can literally pick up a 12 pack of pencils or pens for a buck from the dollar store.
You can look up coding classes for free on the internet, Duolingo is free for learning a new language, Mangolanguages is free if your library provides it, hell you can pick any hobby… Singing, dancing, game design, programming, design, music composition, etc. and I can guarantee you that there will be at least one tutorial available on youtube, and at least one free program for it.
Hell if you got any type of internet connection you can pick up a hobby. Even just researching something you’re interested in whether it be weaponry, dance, music, art, clothes, fashion design, animals, pets, etc. is absolutely free on the internet.
Hell you can even pick up a hobby like roleplaying or writing and all you need is a blog and google docs to write shit in and singing up for AO3 is free.
You don’t need 2,000 dollars and be rich to start a hobby. If you want to pick up something that requires something a bit more expensive like a guitar or musical instrument, 1. look for second-hand sales, 2. look on amazon. you can buy a cheap guitar for like, 40 – 80 bucks, 3. open up separate savings account to save up money, 4. Ask a friend/family member if they have one you can use/have or ask if they know someone who has one that you could use.
Not only is the third one fulfilling, but you can reach a goal and feel great! even if you only put 5 dollars in it a month it’s still something omg holy shit!!
Like very few hobbies are actually expensive to start. When you are starting a hobby, especially if you are just starting a hobby, you don’t have to go balls deep with the most expensive shit that you can find. If you want to do art, you don’t have to start with a 50 dollar brush, 300 dollar paints, and a 70 dollar canvas. If you want to learn music, you don’t have to buy a 2,000 dollar instrument right off the bat and 500 dollar editing program. If you want to learn how to sew you don’t have to get a 300 dollar sewing machine and fabric that is 50 bucks a yard.
being able to live and be happy on a budget is not some lie that Corporate Rich People ™ came up with to look down on and laugh at poor people for being unhappy. In fact, all too often, (and I grew up poor so this is experience) poor people make the excuse of “I don’t have time” or “I don’t have money” whenever the topic of self-betterment comes up. Learning how to budget? No time or money. Researching some cheap and tasty meals? No time, no money. Hobbies? No time, no money.
I swear people complain day in and day out about their lives being shitty and depressing and then take every damn opportunity to never even so much as consider fixing it because “I don’t have money! and I’m too depressed!” like damn. It isn’t some system that is keeping you miserable, it is yourself, especially when you take every opportunity to never improve or try to fix your life or even make it 2 percent better
20 year old beginner: one year of learning flute and butterfly knife skillz 🙂
Fun fact: Adults actually learn those “You need to practice!” skills better than children do.
Kids tend to want to do literally anything aside from learning this skill my parent is forcing me to learn.
Adults actually can sit down and practice things for hours on end. Adults WANT to practice to get their skills better. Adults deliberately set aside time every day to practice. Even if it’s just 20 minutes, it’s productive growth and not wiggling in your chair mournfully watching birds out the window.
Anything from Drawing to Weaving to Violin to fuckin flipping bufferfly knives like a pro – choose a skill and LEARN, dammit! None of that ‘Children’s brains are more malleable’ bullshit. Brain squish is not the end-all of learning!
I’m not gonna bother battling a post with hundreds of thousands of notes
but
Deviantart does not sell your art to third parties
That post you’ve seen is a huge mess
It’s been fact checked to death
It circles around every so often I’ve probably seen it ten times at this point
You’re fine
Your art is fine
Professionals have used that site for years and years and still use it without any issue. I’ve used it. The only reason I stopped using it was because I got tired of harassment but that’s not Deviantart’s fault.
Deviantart lets you limit sharing. It lets you sell prints. It has a huge amount of flexibility. It allows you to watermark your art. Deviantart is a perfectly fine alternative for artists and fanartists.
Honestly, Elicia wouldn’t give 1 (one) corn chip to a site that is up to something sneaky, so if she says it’s good that’s all I need to know.
My main issue with that post going around about the Hot Topic art theft is that it isn’t actually theft. The DA post is a fake, and the art itself was officially licensed.
That doesn’t mean you don’t still have risks—as with any site, you should protect your art. But the third party boogeyman is Tumblr hysteria. Deviantart DOES sell your art, yes, but it’s only to people you choose to sell it to in the form of prints if you choose to license your art that way.
Actually, on the subject of age, let me throw a quick little PSA your way. Kids don’t lie to adults about your age on the internet. Please. Let adults live in their comfort zones. I know we often hear it the other way around, which is also not okay, but last night I found out a girl I’d been speaking to who said she was mid twenties was actually sixteen. It just… it makes me feel uncomfortable. Please respect adults and what they want. Please don’t lie so that you can engage with them. It’s not cool. That’s all. Thanks.
#also it makes it difficult for adults to be responsible #an adult is going to talk differently to another adult than they are to a kid or teenager #just don’t lie to people????
ifesbob 