Person A: You know… the thing Person B: The “thing”? Person A: Yeah, the thing with the little-! *mutters under their breath* Como es que se llama esa mierda… THE FISHING ROD
As someone with multiple bilingual friends where English is not the first language, may I present to you a list of actual incidents I have witnessed:
Forgot a word in Spanish, while speaking Spanish to me, but remembered it in English. Became weirdly quiet as they seemed to lose their entire sense of identity.
Used a literal translation of a Russian idiomatic expression while speaking English. He actually does this quite regularly, because he somehow genuinely forgets which idioms belong to which language. It usually takes a minute of everyone staring at him in confused silence before he says “….Ah….. that must be a Russian one then….”
Had to count backwards for something. Could not count backwards in English. Counted backwards in French under her breath until she got to the number she needed, and then translated it into English.
Meant to inform her (French) parents that bread in America is baked with a lot of preservatives. Her brain was still halfway in English Mode so she used the word “préservatifes.” Ended up shocking her parents with the knowledge that apparently, bread in America is full of condoms.
Defined a slang term for me……. with another slang term. In the same language. Which I do not speak.
Was talking to both me and his mother in English when his mother had to revert to Russian to ask him a question about a word. He said “I don’t know” and turned to me and asked “Is there an English equivalent for Нумизматический?” and it took him a solid minute to realize there was no way I would be able to answer that. Meanwhile his mom quietly chuckled behind his back.
Said an expression in English but with Spanish grammar, which turned “How stressful!” into “What stressing!”
Bilingual characters are great but if you’re going to use a linguistic blunder, you have to really understand what they actually blunder over. And it’s usually 10x funnier than “Ooops it’s hard to switch back.”
some of you never learned the difference between “bad writing” and “narrative choice i didn’t like” and it shows
“I like these side characters and I’m mad that they don’t get as much development as I want” narrative choice, not bad writing
“This character’s abuse of another character is constantly excused and played as a joke even by characters who supposedly care about the character being abused” bad writing
The best fantasy worldbuilding always starts with really asinine questions. Not even basic stuff like “how do they get their food?”. I’m talking much more trivial: stuff like “are their swear words more likely to be obscene, scatological or blasphemous?“ or “what kind of hats do they wear?” – that’s your gold mine, especially once you add “and why?”.
I just finished this book on screenwriting and have highlighted some amazing advice for novelists as well:
1. Save the Cat
This refers to a scene at the beginning of yoru manuscript in which the main character does something that makes the reader root for them them i.e. saving a cat.
This doesn’t have to be something altruistic – it can include smarts or humour or naivety – just something that will make the reader want to follow this character through the story.
Without this scene, you’ll probably end up with a boring character. And no matter how amazing your plot, you need a “followable” character to carry it.
2. The Pope in the Pool
This refers to a scene in which necessary exposition is given whilst the audience is distracted by something more entertaining i.e. having the Pope explain important backstory aspects whilst doing laps in the Vatican Pool.
This is the best way to give readers the information they need whilst still keeping them engaged. Something funny/interesting/moving should happen whilst this necessary exposition is provided.
3. Double Mumbo Jumbo
This refers to the mistake many writers make in asking readers to believe in more than one type of magic/miracle. This suspends reality too much and causes the reader to lose faith in the realism/probability of your story.
So, if you already have magical fairies, don’t throw aliens into the mix as well.
ONE magical element is enough.
4. Laying Pipe
Another error often made is writing a story that needs too much set-up. This means that so much backstory must be explored in the first part of the novel that your catalyst only occurs at page 100 or so.
This will cause readers to lose interest long before they’ve reached the inciting incident. If you don’t get the beginning right and move on the exciting stuff as soon as possible, it doesn’t matter how great your ending is, since few readers will get there.
5. Watch out for that Glacier
This is when the danger in your novel takes too long/perhaps the whole book to get to your characters/to threaten them. Therefore, the reader is aware that there is some eventual threat, but the characters aren’t affected by it throughout the story.
It’s a glacier coming for them rather than a missile. And it dampens the tension.
6. The Covenant of the Arc
Every somewhat important character in the novel should change, except for the bad guy. This is what will ultimately distinguish your good guys from your villain: moral change.
So, take a look at the journey of every primary and secondary character in your manuscript and ensure that they grow/experience some for m of change that is brought about by the events in the story.
7. Keep the Press Out
This is the tip I think should be used with the most circumspection. It’s for you to decide whether you want to follow this piece of advice or not.
This tip calls for leaving media coverage/the press out of your story. If some supernatural/extraterrestrial event occurs in a secluded neighbourhood and remains a family secret, it’s much easier for your reader to believe that it could really have happened than if the whole world is supposedly in on it.
Like I said, use with discretion.
These are all Blake Snyder’s tips (not mine) and are explored in greater detail in the book. So, if you would like more information and more great advice, I suggest grabbing a copy.
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Why do people stop commenting on fics if they’re more than a week or two old? Please comment on old fics. Tell me you like my one shot from 2014.Tell me you like my old multi-chap I finished in 2016 that I spent a year writing. I will be fucking thrilled.
ifesbob 