A girl at work kept sputtering when she was ordering her coffee, and her friends kept giggling. She’s literally so cute omg.
Update: she keeps glancing at me over her mug. Her friend is nudging her. I’m literally. Omg.
UPDATE: I was getting dishes from a nearby table. Her friend said “Do it.” Over amd over. She sputtered out “you’re cute” she’s blushing a lot. Omfg.
Someone asked if I drink espresso straight. I said I don’t do anything straight. She giggled. Her friend smiled. What the frick.
I GOT HER FUCKIGN NUMBER
Her name is Riley and we’re gonna see a movie together on Sunday. OH SHIT.
THIS IS THE CUTEST THING IVE EVER READ
So quick story before I go to sleep
I’m reading a book that I’m actually enjoying for the second time in a while (I finished another book fairly recently but before that not much) and there’s this continuity error
Basically there’s the main character and her gf working on a project with a third person. Except the third person was replaced with the main character
So it stands to reason that the gf and third person would know each other decently well
But 3rd misinterpreted something gf said so main had to clarify.
I’m willing to give it the benefit of the doubt that they didn’t work that long together on the project and I’m willing to give the credit in-universe but as a book it’s pretty glaringly an error
DUDE my teacher canceled class the other day and so the next day we were all like oh no is everything ok?? and shes like “oh yeah its fine its just my wife wasn’t feeling good so i took her home, made her some soup, yknow fun stuff” and i swear everyone in class froze for a sec cuz we never knew she was a lesbian but then we spent a good 30 min of class time discussing whether her wife actually ate the soup cuz we all know she sucks at cooking
this is beautiful
I had a professor who would talk in class about her wife and their four daughters and it always made me go !!! inside. like, wooooow, family goals.
In my undergrad, I took a module that had two lecturers teaching it. The first was very butch and would occasionally talk about how brilliant her wife was in the field and would talk about her kids and general family life. Then the other lecturer took over classes, and she would talk about her wife too, and how brilliant her wife was academically. Then they taught a class together and the penny dropped. They were talking about each other and both thought the other was the literal shit in their area of media.
It’s been delightful for me to watch my friends finally able to get legally married. Every time @crofethr says “my wife” it’s like a chorus of bluejays dance around behind her.
I was at work at a deli a few weeks ago and this group of three women came in pretty late at night. One was the mother of one of them, and the other two were just being really cute and holding hands and cuddling and whatnot. One was leaning on the other and she seemed really tired, so her wife ordered for her and the mom was like, “Married for seven years, they know each others’ orders by heart” and I honestly felt like I’d been blessed
one time a lecturer was discussing all the stupid reasons she’s been called up in front of the board (which include an actual formal accusation of witchcraft) and once a student accused her of homophobia and homophobic statements and she walked into the formal board hearing with her only prepared defense being “remember how I’m married to another woman ok thanks let’s go get lunch”
omg when ladies talk about their wives and just say “my wife” I just get so excited and happy because it is all possible and real. it’s so amazing and beautiful
I’m an optician and one day I had 2 women, one blonde and one brunette, come in to pick up glasses. I had the blonde try on hers while the brunette was talking to one of my coworkers. When she put them on I said, “Oh looks like they’re not sitting straight.” Without missing a beat she said “Oh honey, nothing about me is straight,” and proceeded to pat her wife on the butt and say “Honey, did you hear what I said? It was really funny. Honey? Honey, I said nothing about me is straight.”
So i almost hit a kid with my car.
I was driving through a mall parking lot and I guess the nearby school had just let out. Anyways this kid darts in front of my car and i slam on my breaks. And he dabs. This fucking kids automatic response to almost getting hit by my car was to just fucking dab. His last moments would have been a sick ass dab.
It was an out of body experience.
one time my friends and i got bubble tea and my one friend didn’t know abt the tapioca pearls and he took a sip and then opened his mouth and let like 9 of them roll out of his mouth and onto the floor and then whispered “what the fuck”
it always really bothered me when wait staff ignored me + my friends just because we were young bc we are all really respectful people but the assumption was that we wouldn’t tip
anyway so fast fowards to when i became a waitress and one day this group of scrubbyass kids came in and i had 8 other tables with other people to look to but i overheard that one kid wanted a milkshake but he couldn’t afford it and the other kids offered to pay but he was like “nonono it’s fine” and i looked over and he just looked real run down and sad and stuff —- later it just so happened that our kitchen had a mixup so we had an extra shake and since it would just be dumped otherwise, i snuck it out to their table and gave it to him for free
and his friends were so fucking impressed by this they pooled every fucking cent they had i got a $50 tip and later his friend’s mom came in and said “i heard what you did for that boy” and gave me another 20 and offered me a better job working with her
and meanwhile at my other table a rich white guy i was serving complained bc he didn’t want to pay the 15% tip on a $8.90 bill and when his wife said “she’s been a good waitress, though,” he said, “but just plain good isn’t worth 15%”
So today at church we had a talent show and one of the kids did the talent of telling jokes and he set up a joke “what do you call a duck with fangs” and one of the little kids shouted “A FUCK!” and I almost died.
Dang this post freaking blew up. Almost 90,000 notes.
the mods of the official andrew w.k. fansite had to shut down the forums after a huge ongoing fight broke out among twenty andrew w.k. fans and when they were going in to block the IP addresses of the aggressors they noticed that all of the users in question had the same IP address, which would imply that one single person was posing as twenty different people and just fighting themself, and when they did a whois lookup for the IP address they found out it was literally andrew w.k.
ifesbob 