king-lobo:

bitch-dont-krill-my-vibe:

Graphic belongs to Betsey Brewer Bethel

I know a lot of people might not like metal/stainless steel straws for various reasons, so I want to point out that you can also purchase glass straws, silicone straws (silicone is a great choice if they’re going to be used for kids), or even stainless steel ones with silicone tips! All in all, any of these are better than plastic, and they can potentially last forever.

THE EARLY WORM GETS A TURN

bunjywunjy:

hi everybody, welcome to another excellent episode of Weird Biology! I definitely had some trouble picking an animal for this week. 

“bunjy,” you say, wringing your hands dolefully, “it’s been a while since you did an invertebrate, maybe do one of those”

well, you couldn’t be more right! 

so without further ado, I’d like to introduce you to a good, soft boy.

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a good, good boy!

“oh,” you say dejectedly, still wringing your hands, “worm?”

okay first off, how dare you, worms are great. second, they aren’t even worms, despite the name. Velvet Worms are actually panarthropods, most closely related to arthropods and tardigrades (though they look more like a multi-legged velveteen slap bracelet). Velvet Worms consist of about 200 known species in their very own adorable phylum,

Onychophora. 

the panarthropods first wriggled into existence all the way back during the Cambrian Period, 540 or so million years ago (you know, plus or minus a few million). they have changed very little since then, making the transition onto land but keeping the adorable alien-teddy-bear look. 

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if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.

Velvet Worms are found across the tropics and southern hemisphere, and reach lengths of 0.2 to 8 inches depending on species. they come in many colors, though Red Flavor is probably the most well-known. they are velvety squooshy soft to the touch, and have between 13 and 43 pairs of adorable tiny feets (depending on species). also, they don’t have a skeleton and operate entirely by hydraulics.

unlike vertebrates like you, the Velvet Worm moves by rapidly inflating and deflating parts of their squishy squashy bodies with internal fluid. just imagine that they’re made entirely of water balloons that can wiggle awkwardly in any direction. 

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wobble wibble wobble.

given their soft wobbly balloony body and adorable face, it may surprise you to learn that Velvet Worms are actually voracious predators. they are efficient and successful killers, mainly eating insects and other small creatures. 

Velvet Worms hunt by sneaking up on possible prey and papping it gently with their retractable antenna to see if it is good for eating. which is, uh, not the stealthiest option. I mean, can you imagine if every time you wanted a snack you had to walk up to it like “LET ME JUST RUB MY HANDS ALL OVER YOU TO SEE IF YOU’RE EDIBLE, HOLD STILL PLEASE”. it seems to work okay for the Velvet Worm, though.

but anyway once it has the prey lined up in its sights, the Velvet Worm unleashes its secret weapon.

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SLIME CANNON SLIME CANNON SLIME CANNON SLIME CANNON

that’s right, the Velvet Worm turns its whole face into a high-powered hose that jets a double stream of slime up to a foot away! it’s the super-soaker of nightmares. once the target is slimed, it ain’t goin nowhere. the slime rapidly hardens into a solid mess, literally gluing the victim in place. 

it’s the most badass special attack of any invertebrate short of the Bombardier Beetle. 

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SLIME CANNON SLIME CANNON SLIME CANNON SLIME CANNON

what? how could I not be excited about what is basically a real-life Pokemon move? 

moving on. after the Velvet Worm has immobilized its prey, it unleashes its even more secret weapon. hidden in that soft gooshy adorable face are a pair of razor-sharp nightmare jaws and a powerful dissolving enzyme. the Velvet Worm uses them both on its victim, making quick work of prey.

some species of Velvet Worms will even hunt cooperatively, using their x2 Combined Slime Cannon to bring down large prey they wouldn’t be able to handle separately. these hunting parties are led by a female warlord (wormlord?) who will eat her fill before the other Velvet Worms are allowed to feast.

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cold, merciless and completely adorable.

this group hunting behavior shows that Velvet Worms have surprisingly complex behaviors. but it’s still got nothing on their reproductive strategy, which has been best described as “yikes”.

after a brief courtship that varies between species, the male Velvet Worm just kind of plops a packet of sperm onto the female’s back and leaves. which, not very romantic, but okay. but then the female then proceeds to dissolve some of her skin and absorb the sperm into her bloodstream. holy shit. several months later, the female gives birth to a new crop of wriggly babies. it’s a functional strategy, but probably leads to an interesting domestic life.

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“don’t sass back at me mister, I dissolved my skin for you!”

though Velvet Worms in all their splendid weirdness are still commonly found across the world, we don’t actually know how they’re doing ecologically because they aren’t studied very often.

we do know that Velvet Worms are threatened by habitat destruction and human expansion, and scientists suspect that individual species range from near threatened to critically endangered. this is not allowed.

conservation programs need to be enacted for these good soft boys, and soon. we hope that Velvet Worms and their many many soft gentle feet stick around for a long time to come.

thanks for reading! you can find the rest of the Weird Biology series here.

if you enjoy my work, maybe buy me a coffee so I can warm my cold little hands.

art-angelsz:

lord-blongus:

the-2nd-crusade:

such-justice-wow:

apocrypha-mindokah:

invenblocker:

apocrypha-mindokah:

officialfist:

thatmorguebat:

ihavenotyetfiguredoutanything:

someoneintheshadow446:

ihavenotyetfiguredoutanything:

cynicaldeino:

ihavenotyetfiguredoutanything:

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carryonmypaintedwhore:

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ronaldwheasley:

ronaldwheasley:

i hate everything

THE HEATWAVE HAS OFFICIALLY BEGUN WE ARE GOING TO BURN

So the Americans will understand, 23 Celsius is the same as 73 Fahrenheit.

Yall are fuckin weak tbh

That’s COLD. YOU PANSIES.

I melt at 18°C… rip…

I thrive at that temperature. Are y’all made of ice?

I overheat really easily 😅

Bitch please here in India heat wave means 45 degrees or higher. That’s 113 degrees for Americans.

I went to Lanzarote and was fine in 40°C but that’s because the heat there is a different type to English, but i melt at low temperatures v.v

The problem with the heat in England is our humidity rarely drops below 90%

That’s cold @rallythedead why y’all so weak?

Kek, here an heathwave means 40 Celsius XD

It’s problematic because while 23 C might not be that hot, the high humidity makes it harder for the body to cool itself.

That’s true

not gonna lie i really hate the whole “you’re so weak for not being able to cope with these temperatures” things.

For a start people DIE when it gets this hot. In the UK we have a moderate and high humity climate so pretty much no home has an air conditioner because they would be useless 90% of the time. Most largeish shops and the like will have them but ive never been in a house with an AC, the closest was one house i i lived in that had a cieling fanand it was not that effective.

Secondly it should be pretty obvious that if a place isn’t use to a certain kind of weather then it’ll make coping hard, it is annoying that so many people use this as a means to mock us when its pretty obvious why this is a problem that requires news coverage.

Thirdly PEOPLE DIE, its not a joke, this something that actually hurts people.

Kek lol funny

Bruh 5 to 10°C is fucking great weather to me

I melt at over 30C, whatever that is in Farenheit. Like 80-something

It’s the opposite of the “y’all are weak that’s hot” discourse from the winter

Guys. Different climates and regions have different typical temperature tolerances because of different patterns. And also different other factors contributing to the ability of people to deal with those temperatures/weather patterns.

It’s not hard to figure out.

But personally I melt at 70 and that’s the temperature my family likes for the thermostat, fuck me.